12 things you'll probably never hear someone from Toronto say
The most populous city in the country, Toronto (a.k.a. "downtown Canada") may be internationally recognized for being the home of a certain superstar rapper, for one particularly embarrassing video of one late mayor, or perhaps just for being a good knockoff of New York City.
But there are certain things that arguably make a Torontonian a true Torontonian, beyond our viral slang and how we prononuce the name of our own city, including some things we would likely never be caught saying, such as the following:
It's common knowledge that Toronto loves lines. For exclusive merch, for pop-ups, for baked goods, for ice cream, for fried chicken, for warehouse sales (or just El Furniture Warehouse), for goddamn Brandy Melville, in the dead of winter, in a heat wave, in a shopping mall, we will wait.
I’m not kidding when I say Toronto loves lines. These people love lining up for everything. It’s almost concerning as to why these people have so much time on their hands.— Tally (@TallySalkey) August 20, 2021
Even though the TTC was named the best transit system in North America a few years ago and Toronto, the best city in Canada for getting around on public transportation, people are still forever grumbling about it, whether it's because of delays, air conditioning, random acts of violence, or whatever else.
On any given day you can find Twitter full of people bemoaning something or other about the city's transit — bless the hearts of those who have to field their complaints.
With rent prices hitting more exorbitant highs each month, this comment is just impossible.
It was too funny when Kanye posted drake’s address, everybody in Toronto knows where that man lives anyway lol— whodatt (@whodatt249) September 6, 2021
Most people in Toronto know they can never dream of being able to afford a house here, or even anywhere in the GTA at large — and those who are confident they can are already feeling physically ill about how hard it will be, and how long it will take, to pay it all off.
If you failed to see how many people were crowding the city's patios during our last lockdown mid-winter, or how many rush to get out to them as soon as they're open in early spring (wearing shorts the second it hits double digit temps, no less), then you may be in the dark about how much we love to eat and drink outside whenever we can.
Nothing beats the frolicking vibe that is the city of Toronto on the first warm and sunny day at the end of winter. Like we're all ready to run through fields and get day drunk on a patio— Noelle (Totally not Tony, but also not NOT Tony) (@Noellenarwhal) March 6, 2022
The only time a local ends up in Graffiti Alley is when they're trying to cut around a Queen Street packed with people on the weekends, or are wandering home drunk after too many pitchers of sangria at Java House. And as for the Toronto sign? Never ever! Unless you've got some loved ones visiting from abroad.
Driving to wherever you're headed in the city on a day or night out is a sure sign that you're coming in from out of town, with the exception of something like an IKEA run, after which a Torontonian would probably just ram an unwilling Uber full of bulky home goods anyways.
We all know city streets are just a mess of construction at least half the year, anyways.
Though the city definitely has its share of Jack Astor's, Milestones, and all of the other restaurant and coffee chains that people from the 'burbs are familiar with from their Smart Centre plazas, people in the city largely prefer to support independent places that actually have palatable dishes and good vibes on offer.
As asserted in the beginning, the second "t" just doesn't exist to locals, and if you prononuce it — along with other common T.O. mispronuciations — it's a dead giveaway you don't live here.
That second T is silent baby, it’s “Toron,” followed by a two second pause, then “oe,” enunciated enthusiastically, followed by a curtsy— Michael O'Brien (@DrMocarl) September 7, 2022
As much as we want to joke, one of the things that makes Toronto so great is that it's pretty darn welcoming of everyone and appreciative of their unique background and their experience, which can always enrich our great city — whether they're here to sight-see for a day or moving in for the rest of their lives.
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