toronto mayor

People may just vote for these spoof candidates in wacky election for Toronto mayor

If you're stuck on the decision of who to vote for in the upcoming Toronto by-election, there are a few candidates who are gaining in popularity despite not actually being on the comically long ballot.

With 102 potential mayors to choose from on June 26, the city's residents certainly have their work cut out for them if they want to learn every platform and make an educated choice.

But why waste that time and effort when you could just vote for, say, the Monopoly Man, Rich Uncle Pennybags himself? A citizen of esteem and wealth (and with a penchant for over-development and bankrupting his enemies) he is sure to know how to effectively run the city and look out for the interests of the average person.

"The city is already for sale, so why the hell not?" reads just one version of the joke campaign sign for the would-be official, as designed by local web developer Zoltan Hawryluk.

And yes, you could vote for high-schooler Meir Strauss with his hilariously satirical campaign, or the person who allegedly egged the office of former Mayor John Tory, but wouldn't it be more fun to instead elect the city's long-time mascot, a humble but clever raccoon? 

Posters for one raccoon indicate — which come courtesy of the artists at Flummox Industries — that the candidate promises more affordable housing (for trash pandas), much-needed reform to construction bylaws and additional garbage days for everyone.

Added perks that he is rabies-free and, unlike our last elected mayor, scandal-free!

While we're talking animal mayors, there is also a very real candidate who is running as a team with his dog — and who has apparently garnered some support on those grounds alone.

Other non-human suggestions include local celebrity, Dead Raccoon, and Baby Shark, who has enough fans (and streams) to win by a landslide, since that is what's important.

As some point out, stranger things have happened in government, and this race has been quite the spectacle from the very beginning when Tory admitted to a months-long relationship with a staffer and swiftly stepped down from his post.

With clowns like Chris Sky on the ballot, how can it be described as anything but a circus?

One local comedian perfectly summed up the battle between certain detested public figures running for office in her own campaign video that offers police (duh) as a practical solution to "out of control" homelessness, a crumbling Gardiner Expressway and bike lanes that "are coming for the sick and the elderly."

Let's hope the voter engagement strategy of that 18-year-old candidate (who, quite suspiciously, insists he is a real human and not three raccoons in a trench coat) will mean constituents will take more into account than tryhard social media videos when they hit the polls next month.

And if for some reason you choose not to vote, you can at least bet on the outcome to make things even more exciting and ridiculous.

Lead photo by

Becky Robertson

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