Rental of the week: somewhere in Riverside
I literally had to look up what a “Granny Flat” was when I saw this listing because it’s a term I’d never even heard of. Turns out it’s just an addition on a house for your elderly family members, and essentially isn’t really an actual apartment.
But for $895, maybe you could deal with the lack of actual apartment status? WRONG.
This place is not suitable for actual living, mostly because it’s definitely illegal.
According to the rules, for you to have a secondary suite in your Toronto home: “it must have a separate entrance and contain proper kitchen and bathroom facilities.”
Does this place have that? No.
While many ‘granny suites’ are like a garden shed in the landlords backyard or even a Fonzie-style apartment above the garage, this one is just straight up in the landlords home. There is definitely not a separate entrance.
So, strike one.
It does have bathroom facilities, but said bathroom facilities also double as the kitchen facilities, most notably the kitchen sink.
You know when you have to wash your hair over the bathtub because you don't really want to have a full shower just to wash hair dye out of your hair, and you don't have one of those detachable shower heads that makes said task easier? Yes? You know how painful tile floors are on your knees?
Okay now imagine doing that every day, possibly multiple times a day. You might start to hate life a little.
If you notice, there is a dish rack next to the bathtub, which means you have to hunch over the bathtub to wash pasta sauce out of your pots and pans. Sounds like fun right? You love kneeling to do dishes!
As for the rest of the kitchen — it’s also non-existent. The tiny cube on the floor is the “fridge.” I'm not sure about you, but I usually like to be able to fit at least a six-pack of beer in my fridge without playing Tetris.
It’s like a mini-mini-fridge. As Zoolander might say: “Is this a fridge for ANTS!?!”
Also, please note the lack of a stove or oven. A classic!
But, apart from the fact that this place isn’t a legal apartment and shouldn’t be allowed to be on the market, it’s kinda cute in a overly-cramped-bedroom kind of way. There’s two exposed brick walls that hipsters can drool over, and it overlooks a park which is nice.
Sure, you have to sleep on a single bed wedged between some bookcases, but did you really expect an adult-size bed when the apartment has the equivalent of a play kitchen? But, come to think of it, my Fisher-Price play kitchen still had a sink...
The landlord’s aging relatives? You know, who it was actually built for…
You’re not about to do your dishes in the bathtub or only buy three beers at a time.
Images via Craigslist
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