Toronto group helps find out if you are dating the same guy as someone else
Navigating Toronto's often difficult dating scene can be a real headache these days, from the sheer number of dating apps to choose from, to catfish profiles, to potentially developing feelings for someone that's already in a relationship.
One Facebook group, titled "Are We Dating The Same Guy? Toronto/Mississauga," aims to protect women in the GTA by providing a safe forum where women can share "red flags" or information about men posted in the group.
Typically, a woman will post a photo of a man they met, usually on a dating app, before going out with them to see if anyone knows any "red flags" about them or if they're in a relationship already.
Group users are finding their long-term boyfriends, partners, or even husbands through the group after being posted by other women who are on dating apps.
Are We Dating the Same Guy? Toronto edition is the Yelp reviews for dudes on dating apps that we have all been waiting for— Sam G (@ItsSamG) January 19, 2023
Cafe Paradise on Bloor Street West even posted an Instagram video recently, where one customer says she was sitting beside "three girls who are all dating the same guy" and met through the Facebook group.
The process for accepting new members into the group is rigorous, so as to weed out all the men who may be using a "catfish account" to access all the confidential information posted in the group.
The group auto-declines profiles that have been created in the last year, so the "chances of a guy hearing about this group, making an account, and sneaking in are very slim."
I joined a facebook group "Are we dating the same guy" for Toronto people and this thing is so juicy. I've seen several posts from women warning about guys with fake names, wives, the fact they just got out of jail.— haylstorms (@ItzHayley) January 14, 2023
The group's admins also use a variety of factors, such as number of photos, friends, country, occupation, and school to determine if you'll be granted access to the forum.
However, despite the group's tedious process of accepting new members, plenty of concerned men have gone to great lengths to access the contents of the page.
Damn I remember when that “Are We Dating the Same Guy” group had like 3000 members. Now there are 30k lmao. And some of the info these women drop RUIN lives. Good luck being grimey and dating in Toronto. The girlies are TIRED.— (✿ ✨‿✨) (@nusagii_) February 21, 2023
"Even with this extensive list, guys can still make it in in a few different ways. So far we've found instances where a friend or sister let them use their account, where they logged into a girlfriend's/ex girlfriend's account without asking in order to access the group, and where they never got access to the group but someone sent them screenshots," a post by an admin reads.
The group currently has over 45,000 members, and once you're accepted, there's also a long list of rules that you must abide by.
Joining the “are we dating the same guy” Toronto fb group was the best thing I’ve ever done— 𝚓 (@jesssevenn) December 20, 2022
Members are not allowed to include any personal information about the men they post, including their social media handle, phone number, or address. Users are also prohibited from screenshotting or sharing any information that's posted in the group.
One of the rules notes that the page is about "protecting women, not judging men," so users who make jokes about a man's looks, attire, name, age, or occupation will be banned from the group.
I don’t need cable for entertainment, I have the “Are we dating the same guy (Toronto)” Facebook group for that— doo doo (@meredithmullen) October 12, 2022
"Are We Dating The Same Guy" groups have grown in popularity all around the world, from London to San Diego.
Currently, Montreal's Facebook page has over 22,000 members, Calgary has 20,000, and New York City has a whopping 99,000 users.
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