Given that it's the source of the liquor fueling all of Ontario's parties, it's high time the LCBO had a rap anthem honouring it for the cradle of debauchery it truly is. Now, three of the city's goofiest hip-hop artists - SidePonyNation, Whyte Wine and Sean Ward, have teamed up to create a rap tribute to our beloved provincial liquor repository, which comes with its own low, low-budget (most of which was probably spent on cans of Palm Bay) video and "YMCA"-style choreography.

The lyrics reflect the full LCBO experience: Being flattered when the casher asks for your ID, collecting Air Miles, being really excited by extended holiday hours, and, of course, assembling Caesars while hung over the next day. I personally reject Ward's notion that "for the girls, it's Alize and Bacardi", but am simultaneously relieved someone aside from my mom calls it "the lick-bo".

In the middle of the shout-outs to Schlitz malt liquor, though, a beautiful point is made: Rich or poor, young or old, Veuve or Lakeport - we all buy our sauce at the LCBO. It's our province's great equalizer. I'm going to feel incredibly at one with my fellow man next time I go to the LC for a six-pack of McAuslan Apricot Wheat, and in the meantime, I'm going to slot this it onto my Toronto comedy-rap summer fun mix, right next to "My D*ck".

Photo via YouTube.