This should be invisible

penis candle

A Toronto company is selling penis and vagina-scented candles

Actor-turned-vagina accessory salesperson Gwyneth Paltrow is making headlines once again this month with the launch of a new, almost unbelievable product from her Goop lifestyle and wellness brand: A candle that smells like her own genitals.

Like the gold-plated dildos, vaginal jade eggs and $956 toilet paper sets hawked by Paltrow in the past, Goop's "This Smells Like My Vagina Candle" by Heretic is way more expensive than it sounds like it should be at $75 USD.

It's also sold out on goop.com, proving the power of Paltrow's... marketing skills.

Fortunately for those who of you who didn't get a chance to purchase the now-infamous "vagina candle" while it was in stock, one of Canada's top advertising agencies has created a version of their own.

Two versions, actually: A vagina-scented candle that retails for $75 and a penis-scented candle that costs $100.

"The 'Smells Like My Penis' candle is no different from 'The Smells Like My Vagina candle,' except for no apparent reason it's worth 25% more," wrote TAXI of the product, which they've assured me is real.

"The discrepancy between the two brings to light the unequal value Canada still places on men vs. women in the workforce."

TAXI, which has a large office in Toronto, is currently taking pre-orders for the candle with intentions of producing them when they get a better sense of demand.

All money raised through candle sales will go to the Canadian Women's Foundation, which reports that women are still paid 75 cents for every dollar men make.

"Goop, Gwyneth Paltrow's wellness company, recently released a candle called 'This Smells Like My Vagina' for $75. It sold out," reads a release from the agency.

"TAXI created the 'This Smells Like My Penis' candle to bring attention to Canada’s gender pay gap, pricing it at $100 – the price comparison mirroring the current wage gap."

When asked what the candles will actually smell like, a representative for TAXI joked "the patriarchy, lol."

"No, but in reality we'd mimic the base scents in goop's candle (geranium, bergamot, cedar, etc.) to really drive home the point that these candles are exactly the same," they wrote, "and yet one is still 'worth' more in today's society."

A description of the penis candle on its pre-order page states similarly that the candle costs 25 per cent more than its vagina-smelling equivalent because "even though it's illegal in Canada to pay women less than men, the gender pay gap smells as strong as ever."

On average, women earn 75 cents for every dollar men make," it concludes. "It's time to burn the gender pay gap."


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