scollard street toronto

Rental of the week: Somewhere on Scollard Street

Is this the basement Saw was filmed in? No, really, was it? 

The blue lighting, the weird coloured tiles that line the entire apartment, the exposed pipes and wires — it all makes for the creepiest basement I have seen in a while. scollard street torontoPart of the reason it looks like the set of a horror film is because there’s nothing in this room except for a mattress wrapped in garbage bags pushed up against the back wall, and a fridge. 

Throw in a bucket of bleach and a murder weapon and we’re set!

On top of the grim look of the place, there’s a ton of conditions attached to living here. scollard street torontoThe listing is very specific about what is and isn’t allowed in the apartment.

On the list of "No’s" we have:

  • Parties in the house
  • Smoking inside or within premises
  • Pets
  • Illegal drugs (How would they know? Oh nevermind — cameras, peep holes or whatever other cliche you can think of.) 
  • People who are not accustomed to keeping a neat and tidy space 
  • A kitchen

scollard street torontoYes, that's right —no kitchen. You know, just one of the basic requirements for this to be an actual apartment. But, the tenant "can bring microwave, toaster oven, rice cooker, etc.," according to the listing. I'm not sure where you’d do dishes, but sure, okay. 

The listing also lays out a bunch of criteria about who you have to be. They "prefer" a man, between the ages of 20 and 30, who doesn’t have any delinquencies on the record... Oh, maybe there was a serial killer who lived here previously! 

scollard street torontoThe kicker is this nightmarish abode is $1,400 a month! Ha! Like I’m going to pay that much to be chained to a radiator, especially since utilities aren’t included. 

Specs
  • Address: Scollard Street 
  • Type: Horror movie set
  • Rent: $1,400/ month
  • Furnished? No
  • Utilities: No – you’re responsible for 30 per cent of the utilities even though there’s a professional office on the floor above you.  
  • Air conditioning? No, the chill you get from walking into your apartment is enough
  • Bedrooms: 0
  • Bathrooms: 1
  • Parking: No
  • Laundry? Portable washer to be installed 
  • Outdoor space? No
  • Pet friendly? No 
Good For

 Seeing if you really would survive in a horror film? 

Move On If

You’re a virgin, of any ethnic minority, a stoner, a jock, or any other horror movie cliche. You know how horror movies go. 

Lead photo by

Images via Craigslist


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