orchard park drive toronto

Rental of the week: Orchard Park Drive

Part of me wants to say this is an outdated basement that’s been advertised as an apartment but the other part of me wants to say this is where child catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang put those kids.orchard park drive toronto

There’s something about this place that looks creepy right? Is it the wood panelling, the weird medieval arches, the pleather wet bar, or the outdoor street lights that are being used as indoor lighting?  

orchard park drive torontoOr is it the not so secret, secret door? Seriously, what’s behind it?!? A creepy doll collection? A shrine to Danny Devito? A dead body? Multiple dead bodies!?!

orchard park drive torontoThe only thing that looks like it’s been updated since the 70’s are the washing machines. But, it’s hard to focus on that with the nauseating lime green slat cupboards combined with the faded neon plaid wallpaper.

orchard park drive torontoThe bathroom stresses me out more than a bathroom should. That shelf does not look secure and threatens to give you a concussion if you put anything on it.

orchard park drive torontoOn top of all the other unattractive qualities of this dungeon, it’s also located deep into eastern Scarborough and it costs more than $1,000 a month to rent. Do they think they can charge that much because there’s exposed brick?

I mean sure, hipsters love to pay outrageous prices for retro stuff, that's how Urban Outfitters stays in business, but this just seems a step too far. 

orchard park drive torontoAlso I’m really not even sure there’s actually a kitchen. I think you might have to make do with a hotplate and the wet bar sink…orchard park drive toronto

Specs
  • Address: Orchard Park Drive
  • Type: Basement (I refuse to call this an apartment)
  • Rent: $1,250/ month
  • Furnished? No
  • Utilities: No
  • Air conditioning? No
  • Bedrooms: 1  
  • Bathrooms: 1
  • Parking: Maybe the driveway?
  • Laundry? In-unit
  • Outdoor space? Nope
  • Pet friendly? Noorchard park drive toronto
Good For

Feeling like you’re living in a 70’s medieval themed bar.orchard park drive toronto

Move On If

You don’t want to live in a 70’s medieval themed bar.

Lead photo by

Images via Padmapper


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