I'm hosting karaoke and it's the holidays. Is it? Is it really the holidays? People are dying.

"You have to sing!" no you don't. you don't have to do nothing. I am the host. If someone tries to lay that shit on you, come tell me and I'll tell them to fucking lay off. 'no pressure' karaoke. Sometimes you are participating just by hanging out. We're your family now. No drink specials. You're special. Mop that up. If the washrooms are out of toilet paper just act natural. Don't worry about waking up tomorrow. You're awake now. I'm tough but fair. If you're out on the patio and you didn't hear your name called, well, tough luck sucker.