CD Review: The Groopies "Parking Lot"

I'd like to start this off by saying, there is a certain personality type that would really dig this CD. That type is not me... but if you're the kind of person who can't live without Iggy Pop's "I Wanna Be Your Dog"... who loves when Neil Young just goes mad on his fuzzy-sounding guitar... who appreciates variety... who enjoys lyrical content that's satirical, then you, my friend, should pick up this CD.

Strengths
"Gasoline is out of control / We fill our cars, we fill our souls / Money made is money spent / Contributing to the world's descent", they sing in "89". I like the focus on world issues. Other songs like "Let's Build A Bomb Shelter" are satirical and funny. "Let's build a bomb shelter honey get me some cement, Let's build a bomb shelter, we won't have to pay any rent" he sings to a light-hearted jingle. In a song fettered with raw emotion, he sings of war, "Eighteen-year-old boys are goin to war / Most of them don't know what they're fightin for". These are all pertinent, important messages and I'm glad they said it. Likewise, they play a lot of gigs for charity, which shows they're real people who care about real issues.

For two guys, they cover a lot of sonic landscape. You can detect traces of: The Ramones "hey hey hey" vocals in "No One Else"; some driving Misfits guitars in "All Alone..."; [Jerry Lee Lewis] in "Bombshell Baby"; a little ska interlude with a Billy Idol sneer ("In the midnight hour") in "700 Times Before"; the randomness of Primus coupled with the retro Franz Ferdinand guitars in "Evacuation"; and an all-around feel of Iggy Pop and Neil Young. I agree there needs to be more diversity and pure rock n roll in the Toronto scene. More emerging artists should push the boundaries and give-in to artistic mayhem, rather than translating their sound into radio language to make something people can understand.

"Parking Lot" sounds just like a Vandals' song... consequently I like that song for its silliness and simplicity.

Weaknesses
More often than not, the vocals sound like the most discordant melodies ever, bordering on drunken karaoke. And the supporting vocals are surely noise pollution in "The Devil Ain't Gonna Get Me". There's a mysterious southern drawl when the word "bad" is pronounced "bayawwwwd" that just doesn't seem representative of an Ontario band. While listenable on the CD, some of these songs are nightmares live, boiled down to just a bunch of convoluted noise.

"Me And Mary Jane" reminds me why I hate love songs. For some reason they always suck! I'd like to think girls have functional ears too. They try to go for that whole 1950s "There was a girl and Donna was her name" kind of thing... but their effort falls short of anything even remotely listenable. If a guy ever wrote me a love song like that, I'd tell him where to stick it. "And don't come back until you have something that actually ROCKS," I'd add with disgust. "Waiting For You" proves that this disastrous love song wasn't just accidental, but intentional.

"Fight Another Day" is terribly annoying - from that opening riff that sounds like a bastardized RATM "Sleep Now In The Fire" cover, to the Bloodhound Gang chorus "HEY" shout-outs. The repetitiveness of the song title is a dead weight for an already sinking ship.

Upcoming Show: June 16th @ State Theatre

You Might Life If You're A Fan Of:
Iggy Pop. Neil Young. The Ramones. Primus. The Vandals.

Favorite Tracks:
2, 5, 7, 10

Rating: 2 / 5

Jennn's CD Index:
1 - I'll give you $10 if you can make it through the whole CD
2 - I'm not a fan, but someone might like it somewhere
3 - There are a couple offbeat tracks but it's 90% ROCKIN
4 - This CD rocks my world in its entirety. Buy or die.
5 - Go see them live, support them, join the cult.